THE OVER IDOLIZED SPIDEY

 

Coming from a guy who has dressed up(new header: spidey 2 opener) as Spider-Man for the last two movies its ironic for me to use idolized to describe the world’s greatest superhero.

In the last decade of summer blockbusters and the few holiday hits, we have seen a plethora of superhero remakes.

Advantageous Hollywood has taken the simple comic book stories that our parents grew up with and have made them epic adventures for all ages to enjoy.

Akin to the Lord of the Rings buzz, or even that stupid Harry Potter kid, and of course Star Wars; Spider-Man has his own following. For the past 8 years, since Y2K, we have anticipated Spider-Man hitting the theatres. I remember watching a movie around this time and seeing a 30 second teaser for Spider-Man. The expectation for the first film was scheduled for Thanksgiving 2001 but then 9-11 happened which caused a six month delay. Supposedly the Green Goblin was going to die in a web-sling net that Spidey was to craft in between the twin towers(not Two Towers for you LOTR fans).

Finally May 3, 2002 came and it was here.

I was 16 years old, ditching class, had a severe case of Sophomore-itis and was always looking for an excuse to party. I borrowed the “original Spidey costume” from this kid on my hockey team. He was addicted to craziness just as I was. He sported the costume under his pads for five straight games, it was hilarious. He graciously lent me the costume and didn’t ask me what I needed it for. I wore the costume to school the whole day and not only the costume but the spidey gloves and the silly string shoot people in the face gismo that was a faddy sale at most local Wal-Marts. Everyone joined the Spider-Man bandwagon and out of 2,00o students, I happened to be the only one to dress up for this event.

The whole day was power-packed with people honking their car horns as I would walk to and fro that day. They would yell, “Yeah, Spider-Man!” I was pretty insecure then so wearing a super hero costume made me feel important. I was late to my math class, which was after lunch. For the most part, I disliked math but when I walked in with that costume on my math teacher laughed for 30 minutes straight. I took my liberty to tell the class that I was out fighting crime and saving lives making sure the streets of FoCo were safe. Of course I was lying which is never a good idea. The last class of the day was my Spanish class which was nonstop laughs and always bien. Miss Tappendorf was one of my favorite teachers and yet I was really cruel and mean to her. She let me be Jared for the day and so did my classmates. I could have sworn I saw some evil monster trying to attack the chalkboard and as the Spidey-sense kicked in I leaped for the wall as any skilled super hero would (minus the super powers) and I rested all my 140 pounds on the chalk support thing. The only picture I have of the whole day was that moment.

6 hours later the movie began. Me and the original Ruckus crew saw most big hits opening day, but this time I was dressed as Spider-Man.
The plethora of people that sold their lives for this movie were there. A typical Friday night in Loveland, Colorado; the sun was out, the sky was blue and Spidey was in the air.

Little kids were crying and screaming moving in and out of the movie theatre. The criers were upset that mom and dad weren’t able to make the reservation in time, therefore opening night with Spidey was a miss.

As the crew and I waited in line I began break-dancing, which was a traditional thing to do around crowds and it was the first time I ever danced in the costume. I acted as if I was a pompous celebrity and everyone loved me, so instead of asking people if they wanted my autograph I forced it on the them.

My signature read: SPIDER-MAN, DON’T DO DRUGS, STAY IN SCHOOL.

Of course I was swayed by the cute girls who were flying solo at the movie, they just chuckled than probably said, “I could never date a guy who dresses up like a super-hero, O my gosh, who does that?”

They finally let us in the theatre after we had been waiting for an hour and a half. My friend A.J had gotten fired from this theatre so his re-pore with the management carried much enmity. I was the loudest person there and more loud with my friends. As we were entering the theatre nothing but Spidey chants were coming from our section. The over-stressed manager threatened to throw us out before the movie even started. The fear of missing my idol Spidey hit me and I muzzled my mouth shut. To come this far it wouldn’t be worth it to get tossed out on opening night.

The movie happened and nothing but goodness was going through my mind. As I drove home that night I went into to deep contemplation and five years later I am still contemplating. My question is this: “What is the big diehl with this movie?”

As pumped up as I was it was worship all the way. My golden calf was a superhero who can climb on walls and punch people in the face with great velocity.

I had the same thought June 2004 when Spidey two came out, and that was even more idolatry because I made a short film out of it.

And today, millions, if not billions, will watch the third movie in the series. IHOPPErs, non IHOPers, the saved, unsaved, writer’s and critics like myself will scribble down their opinion of this movie. And six months from now all of us will still be asking the same question, “What is the big diehl with this movie?”

I am not planning on seeing this movie for a while. I have already heard that it was the worst of the three and the best of the three.

I am trying my hardest not to have high expectations. I am a Spidey-fan, no doubt, it just doesn’t feel the way it used to when the first two came out.

Give me your thoughts and opinions of Spidey and why we get so excited about superheroes. 

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