Many times it feels that just intending to do things for God or for the sake of love and being feels as if that is not enough. Is it strange to think that God rewards those that follow through and doesn’t to those that don’t. This is not an issue of being saved or going to heaven. Clearly there is a distinction but it seems very offensive to think that part of operating in God’s grace is the individual being held accountable for results not just intentions. Just a thought and also something that bothers me daily. I am in and rest in His mercy, but I refuse to waste my life on that which will burn away someday.

Death takes it for me,
Cause it’s the norm around me—
All have fallen asleep,
Live like zombies,
Encased in warm bodies—
Enclosed in unceasing hobbies—
I thirst for the truth,
Are not all depressed?
Are not all suppressed?
Are not all supposed to
Hear it clear and fear no
Evil? Are we all the watchmen
Of our own souls?
Are we all to broken to
Remember ever working
Rightly—brain is broken,
Death has spoken, I seek
To make the impact—
To keep love intact—
I am in the shadow
And I am falling apart–
Daily choosing the wrong
Parts—the pieces, the
Attractive things that seek
To lust it out on the lists
Of life, listless I am now
Of the lists I have made—
Of the intentions that have
Been dismayed—I am just
Intention now, I am just
As fallen as him or her—
Or those that live in a blur—
Can the projects be resurrected?
For hell awaits all those with
Good intentions—hollow me,
Hallow me, shine through me—
I am tired of talking,
Of living like summer will
Never end, its over, its gone,
No more sand, no more fire,
No more works, no more of
The closeness you used to feel—
No more promises just the nonsense
Of being a fuse, being empty—
Listless now, for tomorrow dares
To show me a new opportunity,
To hopefully change

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