Close Again

Emptied out over the years
Edge of the driveway fears,
Left it in spring, when it never did
Rain, when the blizzard was the wizard
With the wand, with the bond, with the
Connection to you, in the aisle, all the while
Worthwhile looks from you, I thought I knew
What was close, what it meant to be a host,
What it means now to try not to boast—
I am dead around You, and around all that
You do—I see all from a distance,
Walking in resistance,
I am no miracle man,
I am a Minnesota man,
For the love of cold and
Winter—O, for all that skating
Taught me—how you came in the stands,
You clapped both hands—
Mom held her head low
For all that the injury could go-
I hope I am new, I hope I am
In the renew—I hope I cannot
Feel this way for to long—
That feeling of disconnect—
The city it sits—black, white
And full of little light–
L.A. is a lonely journey
Under the bridge,
Under the pain you
Bring to me—I have just
Firework memories now—
When sparks did fly,
When backseat was where
You did sit, when near me
Was never nearly enough—
I wait and I pause I ask for
The because—Why do I long?
Why do I thirst? The cops verse
The cape and there is still an ache—
Black Knight, black crusader,
Blackened Darth Vadar, are you
My father? For it seems the same—
A mask to blame, where you hid
Behind it—the way you talked,
The way God is not—not my dad,
Not a broken man with broken
Dreams—ache, please, longing,
Please—you are not a myth,
You are all that is true
And all that is pure,
And all that is for sure—
I cannot get this anywhere else—
Even when it seems so close
To feeling close again

2 thoughts on “Close Again

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