Usually when its been months on end without a real “post” of some kind I incline myself to decline you(that was like a Michael Scott line) to sit down and sip some tea and listen to all the random things that have created chaos in my life and …….the list goes on.
Its 4:04 am and its much to late( really I just woke up) to discuss EVERYTHING related to life, writing and Jesus. But, some kind of update might be helpful. Really, I just want to express that we are always evolving. And no, I don’t believe in evolution or its compromising twin brother “theistic” evolution either. Is it a deal breaker? Well, maybe not but regardless of terminology the Creator is at work in my life, in our lives and in the lives of those around us, therefore, He is much to alive to not be apart of anything. Once the stack of books gets it’s proper rotation I want to read some views on Open Theism which involves discussing this whole idea of free will and how God responds to humans in the earth.
The reason why I avoid these essays is because I always feel like I have way to much to say and way to many side points to some main points. But, you should know( to those just joining in) that what you have seen in the last two months in poetry really is a culmination of probably the last year of thoughts. Last May 2014 I actually went into the summer eager to break down the “I am addiction” poems and other various titles that were rather raw and long and episodic, but I never did. The summer turned into three awesome trips–Rochester, NY to see Zack; Kansas City Road Trip with Kenny; and Colorado Springs( of which I grew up in Fort Collins) for our yearly football draft. In between those trips was a lot of film reviews and it just never happened.
Let me just say I am always learning. I am always pressing into insight and understanding. The last two years of life have been some of the best moments of putting together( in the grace of God) that which has been stirring( to say the least) in the last 12 years. When I was 18 I moved to Kansas City and sold my soul( not really) to IHOP-KC that of recent has been in the news quite a lot. It was the start of a shift in learning that I am still learning has proven invaluable or more valuable then I would have ever thought.
We are commas. God is the period. He is the final say and the final word on how we appear before Him. I am wearing someone’s Patriot’s shirt right now. I am listening to Switchfoot’s ‘Love me enough to let me go!’..to let me follow through/to let me fall for you/breathing in, and let it go..every breath you take is not yours to own..its not yours!’ I am eating Hummus and pita bread( to stay in touch with the Armenian in me). I am drinking the same kind of coffee I have had since two summers ago–Starbucks Blonde Roast. I am stalling on writing a paper on two views on marriage as it relates to Domestic Violence..how the man in Christianity can almost have just as many power struggles as someone who is not a “believer!”
Let me just say..this is not the end. This post is not the end, it is only the beginning. But, you out there..you random soul that doesn’t know me, I am real, I promise. Yes, the green shirt with the black backdrop picture is three years old and the green shirt close up picture is from October 2014. I have lost some weight so I really might look a little different. You out there..reading this..I am the weakest person I know. I am prone to more problems then anyone else. I “feel” which is a modern day tragedy to start your day with those two destructive words. Our overly nihilistic nonsensical view of no absolutes is creating very shallow, dumb people. That is a whole other topic. But, you are out there and you are searching and something deep in you is the only reason why you are still searching. Nothing changes in terms of feeling weakness when we come to Jesus. Really, we covet the feeling. We are implored, however, to not just say we are weak but rather we are to be “poor” in Spirit. Poverty is what you need. Empty is what you crave. Death to self is what you need. Love is why you exist. Skyscraper love. So high, yet we are so low all the time. You search, yet you are raised up in it. You seek and You are satisfied when you press into God. Why does this matter?
Let me just say..your knowledge..your information..I hope it can lead to a reality up above that is way better than any of kind of pursuit. But, I..weak Jared that loves talking about his life..Well, because its a good life to live, its a gift, its being unwrapped each and every day! Ahhh! What am I even saying! I’ve tasted the darkness and I’ve been lost in the shadows. I have not been you only you have been but let me just say something..”WHOSOEVER!..believes will be saved! Did you hear that? John 3:16 is saying that not just the good and seemingly upright souls get Jesus in faith but ANYONE, NOBODIES, WEAK PEOPLE, BROKEN PEOPLE, ANYONE..ANYONE can be saved and anyone is what the world is full of. Be great. Don’t stop searching.