Close To

To close to you still
As we are never just a still
Mountain lover I was, always
Called it climbing to be better
Others said running from bad
Weather, when it rained it poured
Now I am asking for more, more of
A fill in for all of the places you do not
Exist, or persist in the shame that got you
I am expectation,
And it all falls on me, it all forwards its email
To me, I see it last,
I live it half the best,
Just be happy and be away now,
Just be new, no, not me–
For I cannot give up the belt that
You used to whip me,
For I too am not wanting to climb anymore,
Rather I am still running and Fading
Into the mountains
To close to tell how far away it can be,
Never is God ever not near,
Never is God never not clear,
Never can we put anything down on paper
And not expect it to blow away
Never now can you be sure that it will
Rain and hail and follow you before you
Get to close to Hell,
I bow low again,
Down the mountain again,
Just to not just hear up there,
But to live new down here

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