You could say we all start a lot of things we don’t finish. In the blogging world it has to do with starting what you write and not getting to that finale of pressing publish.
I can’t say that it has been an easy journey. You should see the hundreds and hundreds of notes on Evernote. I just got my computer fixed a few weeks ago. The same Mac that I got three years ago. You would think that writing would just be much easier because this battery can stand not being plugged in, but I can’t.
I am not plugged in. I am a lose wire attached to something that is called the source.
I am telling you now that your life is about to get wild.
I am afraid of people that I know, knowing what is really said on this thing. I am afraid they will find me and corner me and tell me how imperfect I am.
Distance and disappointment go together. The closer you get to something that doesn’t let you down the less likely you are to have distance. However, when people disappoint you and church lets you down, then, the instinct kicks in. The run or stay instinct.
Let us just get real honest here. I am about to turn 31 years old. This blog started almost a decade ago when I was 21. I have spent a lot of time thinking more than I have actually acted on those thoughts. Reading Making Ideas Happen in 2012 helped me understand that creativity feels like a tormented assent to the summit but without organization you will be calling home wanting to come down from that mountain.
I am not sure how to fit in anymore. I am not as attached to getting everyone around me to understand what I have to say. However, I need people. I need perfection. I need the things that every soul needs.
Perfection is the journey. We don’t pursue being perfect. We pursue the one who is perfect. That famous verse: Be perfect, for my Heavenly Father is perfect.
That verse is inserted in the Sermon on the Mount. The ultimate sermon on human behavior. The ultimate climax of colliding with your depravity. The ultimate picture of perfection.
Jesus is the perfection we seek. When people hurt us. When we lose perspective on eternity we lose this pursuit.
Emotional health has been a huge part of the church I go to. It has been a centerpiece in how I have approached my mind, and my relationships.
Perfection is what is in process.