Thought you would be the one,
Be the one to save me,
Be the stay in the stay with me.
I was just trying to assess,
Trying to assess my weakness,
It was always for you, it was always me and You.
Now I am trying to continue all those days that don’t
Have you,
Now I am staying up all night waiting for the next
Flight, I know you never liked me traveling, and moving
Around so often,
It felt like a coffin,
Like a dead zone for you to sit in,
But I wanted to be the one to do the things I
Try to love.
My life is in circles,
Its a virtual tour,
Its a daily explore,
So maybe you should stop being so afraid,
So afraid of things changing.
I just wanted to continue,
With or without you.
I just wanted to let go of trying to
Find you, or trying to show up just
For you.
I know you like the stage,
I know you like the attention
I know you will never forget to mention
All the reasons you wanted to stop this,
But I can’t be the one to make you continue on,
I need to move on too,
Past you, past summers, past fireworks,
Past everything that ever was great about trying
To figure you out.
I wanted the wild kind of prayers to pray,
I wanted the wild kind of love for You
I wanted the summers to stay free as
Long as there was a you and me.
Maybe I am still writing about the same themes
Of my youth,
Maybe I am done looking for the proof.
I am hooked on more than a feeling.
I am hooked on believing.
I am not faker,
I am no taker.
I am no perfect kind of lover.
I just wanted an edge to stay on,
I just wanted friend to lean on.
I just wanted another someone,
Cause I got to much to say these
Days to keep it in, to keep it deep
Inside of me.
I am going to continue,
Even if it seems like its without you,
You already took up my time,
Took it all up,
Now I am still bad at growing up,
And not accepting what must continue.
It is real to be here, and it is without you.
And that is fact that will continue.