Piles of shame,

Your clothes on the floor,

I wanted more,

Your body to explore,

Is this war?

Heart is locked up,

Head is messed up

I know I abuse you,

Give you a stage,

Try to worship you

But you fade away,

Was it ever love?

Were we a family,

Did you die slowly,

New oceans,

Same movements,

I rarely answer when you 

Call me,

When is love gonna get here,

Your fear is what I hear,

Now I’m crushed,

And piles stack up

I stopped the dreaming,

I left the living,

I keep the worship,

I still bow down,

How high can I climb?

Will you catch me?

Is this for free,

Or is there a cost to this 


Piles remain,

And I’m the same.


You got the skin,

You looking slim,

Your body is inviting,

Lust is on the list

And I can’t check it off Just yet,

This mind is broken,

Self- love is at the bottom,

I know I’m always leaving

And always asking you to Be with me,

Where is happy,

I think I was a kid when I felt that,

Can we go back, Can we rewind the time?

When was innocence?

You should have stopped me,

Talked to me, Showed me how to live

, Now I’m walking the streets 


Hatng home,

Cause I am lonely,

Love doesnt pass through me,

Sin is at the door,

Lust on every corner,

Are you the coroner?

I’m dreamimg of bridges

And high places,

No one says You are coming soon!

Are all deceived? Isn’t hell already on the

earth? I’m not free

 And I see the flags,

I can’t surrender just yet,

Your body is to good To pass up,

When will I grow up and be a man?

You got the skin, It has me in,

Death isnt the sin

It’s closer than we think.


It’s Saturday and are you lonely?

Are you home, is it alone?

Are we still at this again, the memories

Did they just happen,

I know I want love and it feels

Far away, the voice of my father it

Follows me,

I got the rental and I paid the price

To drive you around,

That summer was pleasure and

I miss the measure of a man I used to


I was better around you,

Where are you now?

Are you happy?

Do you see your soul when you look

My way?

Have I been replaced, is your body still

All I want, are you just another body

Follow, I wish I would have missed you

When you were around,

Now I’m lost a little without you,

I’m in cold dark rooms and this heart

Is still burning,

Will I always miss you or will

You disappear from this brain,

For now, it’s Saturday,

And you remain in my


Eyes Awake

Eyes are awake,

Heart is a break 

And You are in between 

Remember how fast it used to Be,

I am alone, You’re not with me.

I lie awake and I lie To You, 

Why did it take 3 hours

Of you sitting next to me.

I have sorrow but not for You,

for me.Are we independent, 

Or are we free? Are you bored,

Is that why you’re with me.

Eyes are awake,

Settle down lover 

Are you sure this is Kizmet,

Take me back to the night 

We met, It was swings and things 

Parks and places,

Midnight, alright,

I used to move better,

New weather, got me 


You’re a burden I carry,

Can I apologize, Blue skies

for new days 

Are you gonna remember my Eyes?

I have been burning forYou,

It’s pressed down and buried,

These streets are deathAnd where is the

departure, Is it soon,

Eyes will close but for now 

They lie awake.


I only see the time at midnight

,Are you up in the light?

Why can’t I say I love you

Is your goodness hidden,

Are we back in the garden?

Who is women but another

Body to follow, Your name I don’t

hallow, This love is shallow,

This soul is hollow.

I still see the clock

And we are running out of time,

No one says You are coming soon!

I’m busy making money, I’m still

thirsty, Injustice doesn’t move me,I still

have your pictures

And what about your future,

Are you on the clock

Does your heart tick?

We used to click, But you’re just a

memory, This heart is thirsty,

This body is about to fade,

I am just an outline on the pavement,

Probably gonna die in the streets,

I’m worried cause the clock has

been ticking, and have we wasted it,

Is my life on the sand? I don’t make plans,I

make decisions, Are you on the clock?

Don’t teach me about death,

Show me how to live.


Is there water here,

Letter now with a dear,

Your voice I cannot hear,

I scrape against cars,

I cannot sit still,

I need mercy behind the wheel,

I see cars tumbling down,

On top of each other,

Sirens scream in this town,

Where are you?

I’m in a circle of broken 


Who is my friend?

Do they comprehend?

Broken is only the beginning.

I’m thirsty not for water but 

For mercy,

I got your number saved,

I know we misbehave,

Your body is a memory, babe,

I can’t save you tonight,

Your lips are certain,

Eternal goes the curtain,

Are we in this forever,

Cause your flames are still burning,

This pain is a burden,

Is there water here,

Is it living?

I’m dead when I sleep,

I dream of escape,

Drifting when you see me,

Sitting in a circle,

Lying about my life,

Asking for help,

But who says hello,

Who lends a hand?

Where is the connection,

Is it not here?

Mercy Sirens, Pt. 2

Mercy in the sirens,

Blue and red,

Caught dead and

Empty handed,

All I have is a car full 

Of dreams,

This soul is twisted up,

Like dark and blue,

Are the cops always this

Busy? Do you still miss me,

Do you think about me

Its the middle of the day

And I am here to stay,

I’ve lost this battle,

Love and lust don’t

Sit well together,

I am open for you,

But you’ve closed

That weather,

You’re a storm on 

The inside,

I knocked on your door,

Wore a mask,

Kept you protected,

Your touch was


But you can’t

Receive love 

And who am I, then?

I spoke out loud and 

Made the confession,

I walk with shame,

And you know my name,

I am called what you see,

But no one really sees

I look and I don’t speak,

I’ve stored it all up,

Wrath or treasures?

Cause one day its gonna

Break and I won’t be able 

To hide,

But your name stays wide,

It reaches past me,

I am sorrow and you know


I confess and I say I want to 


Where is mercy? 

Can it come to me,

Or am I not ready?

Am I not the one you


Mercy in the sirens,

But still I speed and

Still I don’t change,

Covered in diamonds,

As if I can outshine You,

Are You love?

Or is that just what they 

All say?


How much does it cost to keep your 

Pictures? Will you send video?

I’m still stuck, 

I want to see,

I fade like I can’t,

Cause I’m still beating,

Heart bleeding,

Your air in veins,

The drugs for my brain,

Do they work?

What’s my prescription?

Was it missing when we were 

Kids, cause my life is not like yours,

You are happy and secure,

I’m not so sure,

Can I keep the things you send to me?

Is your body worth it,

Can I stop this love,

Or are you still a killer?

I’m breathing in the shame,

I speak and the world judges,

Aren’t you just a flaming sword?

Do you ride the Heavens to help me,

Is your horse white in the night when 

All is never right,

Do your videos expire?

Are you for hire?

This purchase is fire and 

I’m consumed, 

There is sorrow for borrow 

No refunds for the sin

It’s wages is in,

Weakness the storage bin,

I’m lost in your pictures,

In the things you send me

I’ll never know the cost,

But I’m sure it’s everything.

Mercy Sirens

Mercy in sirens,

Covered in diamonds 

No more chances,.

Empty mansions,

Do you fall asleep early,

Or do you wait up for me?

I just want to go home,

Are you alone,

Or are you out there 


You changed oceans,

How are the waves?

Are we still tossed to and 

Fro, wheres your corruption?

Is this deconstruction?

I still have your picture,

What about the future?

Are you still drinking?

Pacing the halls,

Holding your brain hostage,

When are you gonna leave him,

Are you gonna run to me,

I only got enough love for me,

I’m in a drift,

I feel the shift,

I know your body,

But I can’t let go,

I’ll take it slow,

There’s mercy in the sirens,

I’m covered in diamonds,

No more chances,

Just lustful romances

And your pictures stay close,

Are you the rose,

Or is this just noise,

I’m in a drift,

This isn’t a dream 

I got endless chances 

And future romances,

Cause Your love is clean,

And washes these dreams,

There’s mercy in the sirens 

A Year Ago

is your hand heavy?

can you forgive?

cause when I’m alone I feel that you’re gone,

it lasts all night long,

I don’t know what I feel

i just want what’s real,

Are you from everlasting?

can you parent me?

cause im still going back,

back to white walls and

empty halls

When I wanted to die

And let it all go, when i asked for safety

And you fueled me on empty, is your hand heavy?

Are you here?