First of all thank you everyone for commenting and participating. Everyone had much to say about leadership. I feel privileged to be in leadership on the Night Watch at IHOP. I feel that recently I have really accepted the fact that I am a leader and that I always have been(I could tell you stories of using it for the wrong reasons). This inner settling, called getting over myself, has been a serious shift in the way that I live my life. I know that I am weak and I will make mistakes but the fear of failing as a leader, and in life, has plagued me for a long time.
What I have come to believe about leadership is that as many people said it is about serving and dying to self and not being the guy that has it all together. Like I said, the fear of failing is worse that actually failing, which we have a wrong paradigm(IHOP for view) of failure. My mom once said that the only way to get good at making decisions is to make decisions, it is that simple. Most things in life you have to experience and live through the tensions of growing.(except drugs, premarital sex and immorality; you don’t need to experience these things to know what it is like(trust me its all retarded and is sin covered up with the bandwagon of this sick world)
I only make the ‘except’ point for those people out there that read this blog and here me say ‘experience everything.’ NO! Learn from those around you and if you have fallen, God forgives, stop ‘fitting in.’ God is not mad if you have sinned(He kind of is, just not the way you think, just repent and be cleansed). AMEN.
I sometimes preach when I write and I want to be careful with my words. The point I am making is that whether you are born a leader and you know it or you aren’t sure(does not mean being on stage like most people think) the issue for all of us is growing in His grace and boasting in weakness.
As a person in leadership and friends with leaders, I think leadership is for weak people(yes, we are all weak) but it is for the people that have dynamic gifts to speak and lead and God knows if they go astray that gift is going sour in the world(yes, also true for everyone). So, leaders do have it harder, in that sense, because they have to always keep the standard high for others and use their gifts for others, not for themselves.
What I have found is that the more I focus on growing in His grace and boasting in my weakness the more I am able to lead well. And if I loose all my ‘leadership,’ then I gain Christ. And at the end of our lives that is all that matters.
I hope this makes sense for everyone. I just know that growing can be the hardest thing to do because you have to face the fact that you can’t grow yourself in God, you can’t fix your shortcomings, you have to choose his ability to grow you in Him.
Much Love to all those people who have told me the truth(it has hurt, but has given me strength to endure)