By The Door

To many years now waiting by the door

Hoping for you to want more of who I have to be,

By the door waiting for you to leave soon and long

Awaited expectation has been driving me because I silly

Can’t see what you have done for me now but Lord I am

To strong now, for to long now because a broken past has

Had me at last, loved not so well for to long now, and all those

Heartbreaks from human think tanks has let me down now

But to lovely you are to behold and as I grow old with you now

I want more to lay down on the line, as I have studied what is cool

You desire I stay a fool and be friends with the ground now because

You are close to the encounter inside the hour I wait upon you,

For my eyes have transgressed and seen worthless things, my

Heart has expressed the best dressed lady around me and even

She doesn’t do it for me—for days will come when that will truly

Become what I am now but I wait for you alone now—and as I wait

Lord please remove the hate inside the grate of flames waiting to be

Burned and signed away now, stamp it on me forever that I’m going to

Live forever now, for Lord here I am waiting for you, by the door like you

Are leaving this very moment, as I wait for the abandonment you reverse

It on me, that is what you require of me, bags packed so neatly and palms

Sweating so hotly, Lord I need you to come and touch me because I’ve pushed

You away for to long because you might just do me wrong because I’ve been

So afraid of having it made—what you desire is me in weakness and what you

Want is the meekness of the future days that I live with now, so I wait by the door

No more, you aren’t going to leave me for sure—so, Lord I wait for you

At Ease

Floating in disconnect lately,

Clicking upon the wings of wasting away

Saying all that is needed to say, Jesus swayed by the

Way inside me today, billion dollars inside my chest but

Pennies to my name, feeling lame and walking it out that way

The disease of not being at ease has slipped in me and to appease

The most high I would likely die in my own blood tonight, for the

Weakness inside steadily prevails along with messages not so well

Now the garden of Eden back to it again, Adam where are you He said,

Dead always, women silent not she was and it was soon rotten son

To the begotten Son future now on that cross somehow, die now and

Repeat the eating process, for thirsty I’ve rarely been for hunger always

Now turning inside me now and health it cries out, for sugar has replaced

The sweetness of your name in me and this game neverending, put me at

Ease not so much because you love the screwed up and cast down now